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What are some funny and smart quotes?

15.06.2025 05:05

What are some funny and smart quotes?

My sister Tracy sent me these a little while ago. I thought I’d share them. Thanks Trace.

“A Freudian slip is when you say one thing when you’re really thinking about a mother.”

“It’s a little known fact that pigs are the smartest animal. Scientists say that if pigs had thumbs and a language that they could be trained to do manual labor. They give you 20 to 30 years of loyal service and then at their retirement dinner, you can eat them.”

Why cant I sleep on my side after getting my covid vaccine? I just got the shot and I’ve been overstimulated from not being able to sleep, my arm is very sore and it hurts so much to move and I just want to sleep but it hurts if I lay on either side

“It’s a little known fact that the tan became popular in the Bronze Age.”

“There is no rule against postal workers dating women. It just works out that way.”

“Ah just like all women. If they’re not turning down your proposal of marriage, they”re accusing you of suspicious behavior in the lingerie changing room.”

Delta Force selection is originally based on SAS selection, so why is there no brutal jungle phase for Delta Force? It seems like it's based only on the Brecon Beacons section.

Few people had funnier or smarter quotes than Cliff Clavin from the TV show, Cheers.

“Everyone in the Swiss Army owns a Swiss Army knife. That’s why no one messes with Switzerland.”

They did a study between postal workers and chimpanze...

Can the existence of past lives be proven without the use of hypnosis or a pendulum to inquire about previous incarnations?

“The human brain can only operate as fast as its slowest brain cells. Too much alcohol kills brain cells, especially the slower, weaker ones. So, regular consumption of beer eliminates the slower brain cells after you’ve had a few beers which will speed up your brain.”